Things to love

Hubby and I had to go out of town this weekend. Not a romantic getaway or anything like that. But there was still lots to love this Valentine weekend.

Hubby and I exchanged Valentines on Friday, since we weren't going to be home for the actual day. And, apparently, Hubby thought Valentine's was kind of like Christmas. Because I got this incredible new Vera bag. Oh. my. gosh. I heart it. (And, yes, I did feel a little lame when I gave him his chocolate peanut butter hearts and recycled clay coffee mug. But he seemed to like them, so I guess that's what counts. Or something. Right?)

I was further filled with love while watching the opening ceremony of the Olympics. Parade of Nations? Whales swimming across the floor? k.d. lang singing Hallelujah? Crazed punk rock pirate fiddle playing Irish step-dancing Canadians? YES! I am hooked from the get-go on these Olympics.

I have three versions of REM's Harborcoat on my ipod. When I was running on Saturday morning, they shuffled in back to back to back. Have I said it before? I heart you, Michael Stipe.

My favorite restaurant managed to prepare a near perfect meal for me on Saturday. If they had had vegetarian friendly soup, it would have been totally perfect. But, alas, it was not to be. But I'll that potato gorgonzolla salad and those freakishly fresh chocolate chunk cookies. No problem.

I finally remembered to check and see who's being inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame this year, and I was oh so thrilled to see that gloriously, mercifully, beautifully, absolutely, finally The Stooges will be induced. Can I get an Amen? Because, seriously, how much more rock and roll can you get? If you take The Stooges out of the picture, a whole lot of other bands disappear, too. I have been waiting for this one. If you are unfamiliar, just go right now to your nearest record store and buy Raw Power. You need nothing else. The name says it all. The title track, Search and Destroy, and Your Pretty Face is Going to Hell. Top it all off with the incomparable Iggy Pop? Perfection.

And did I mention the reason for our trip out of town?


To meet Brother and Sister In Law's new twin boys.

Top that off with President's Day off of work (for which I heart Presidents Washington and Lincoln even more than before), and I am practically bursting with love.

Happy belated Valentine's.

You Capture - Work

So, me and work, we have a love/not so much love relationship. Put me in a room with 30 kids and tell me to teach them - I can do that (with joy). Other things outside that room? Not always so great. This year is hard. I guess that happens, though, huh? This is my work...





Get to work over at Beth's.

free time

I may be in the minority here (especially among those in the field of education), but I love snow days.

I know the conventional wisdom among grown-up type people is that "now we just have to make it up." Yeah, we do. But we'll make it up when it's not so dreary and cold and windy and miserable. We'll make it up on a day when leaving the house isn't a chore that takes a good 30 extra minutes of the morning in which to mentally and physically prepare for the actual leaving of the house (and that's after digging a path to and/or around your vehicle).

And in the mean time, you get this beautiful, unexpected gift - free time. Not free time, as in "I like to play Scrabble in my free time." But free. time. Time that was not originally meant to be yours, but that you may now do with whatever you'd like. That is a gift I cherish, and do not take lightly.

To date on this snow day I have: done yoga, run (on the elliptical), luxuriated in a hot shower, dressed in the most comfortable, warm fleece I could find, not fixed my hair, eaten some breakfast, sat on the sofa, and finished the book I was reading (Committed by Elizabeth Gilbert - an actual grown-up book, no less).

My next activity will be making tea and looking out the window while I drink that tea. Perhaps while pondering what book I'll start next.

At some point, I may actually venture out into the snow globe that is my town (I have, I will say, adored snow globes my whole life) and get some lunch for Hubby and me. Why? Why go out into the snow and cold and wind and the miserable when the local school system has decreed that it's probably not the best idea? Why endure the leaving-the-house-prep-time for some soup and sandwiches that I could just as easily make here in the comfort of my own home?

Because I have free time.

(and I say thank you for it)

Sometimes I....

Sometimes I feel so overwhelmed that I forget how to breathe. And I just stand there, gasping, trying desperately to remember how to get oxygen into my lungs. Hoping that it will just magically happen.

I can feel my heart start to race, but I can't make it slow down. I can feel the back of my neck begin to bead with perspiration, but I am powerless to make it stop.

Everything about me begins to tighten and constrict and I am afraid that I will be crushed from within.

Sometimes I just stop. I can't move. I can barely think. Except to hope that this passes as soon as possible.

And I can get on with my life again.

*****

tell it to me tuesdays

List Time

1. For the past two days, I have run without any form of knee brace. That feels significant.

2. Once when I was running, I saw a man fall off of the roof of a house. It literally stopped me in my tracks. I wasn't quite sure what the protocol for this was, so I just called out "Are you okay?" And this man pops up out of the bushes, brushing himself off, and says "Yeah, I'm fine. I do it all the time."

What? You do it all the time? Why? Is it, like, recreational?

So I just said "Okay." And kept on running.


3. Best Friend and I are going out to lunch today. This sound like a minor kind of event. But it's actually more like a strategically planned tactical maneuver. I work something like 9-5 hours. She and her husband both work more non-traditional hours. And are raising two beautiful girls. So it's reeeeeally hard for us to coordinate our watches for some quality best friend time. And we've learned the hard way that we should not try to get a sitter for her girls if we would like to lunch. So it's now about picking a day and hoping her husband gets home early enough for us to go. This is our third attempt since December. A tish maddening, but, we gotta do what we gotta do. I'm glad we do it.

4. Yesterday Hubby, who works from home, was gone all day doing work (meaning corporate suck up) type things. So the house was empty. So I stayed home from work. All. by. my. self.

5. Today when I was running, I saw a condom in the middle of the seventeen degree, snow covered road. I did not investigate to see if it was used or not (because ewww!), but all I could think was "that had to have been cold."

6. Six months from today, I'll be seeing U2 live. I'm just saying. I'll be wearing tank top for that. I cannot imagine being warm enough to wear a tank top.

7. I have been having this passionate love affair with dates. As in the dried fruit kind of date. Ohmygosh. I seriously think I have a problem. Once I start, I can't stop. They're sticky and sweet and chewy and yummy. I suppose that's better than having a love affair with, say, heroin. Or triple chocolate mousse pie. But still.

8. I started running with a friend from work once a week. I enjoy it much more than I could have imagined. I haven't run with other humans (aside from races) since high school. I think it's good for me, on many levels.

9. I run a lot, but I have had the same pair of cold weather running pants for about 14 years. They are from K-mart. They were too big when I got them. I have to pull them up like Urkel for them to even think about not falling down. They have been falling apart for about 13 years. But somehow, I can't bring myself to spend lots of money on a real pair of cold weather running pants. Hubby, who runs not so much, has about seven pair of really nice cold weather running pants. They sit in his drawer, all lovely and waiting to fulfill their God-given purpose. I do believe I'll be wearing his cold weather running pants from now on, thankyouverymuch.

10. That's my list for today.

You Capture - Faces

Cute Kid's First Trip to the Chocolate Shop




Cute Guy Out in the Cold

See more at Beth's.

Invincible? Um....

I've accomplished some things in my life that have felt significant to me, that have made me proud or made me feel like I really, truly did something. Lots of things, both personal and professional. But I don't know that I've ever really felt invincible. Empowered? Maybe. But only in my head (or my heart).

Part of that is just me; just how I am. Who I am. I'm quiet. I don't tend to put much importance on the things I do. I'm not sure I ever have. They mean something to me, yes. Usually a great deal. They may, at times, be helpful or meaningful to others, sure. But I don't feel that I'm doing anything of earth shaking importance. I'm just a girl. I set goals. I accomplish them. I move on. (Or if I don't accomplish them, I dwell endlessly on it, but that's for some other time.) Preferably without fanfare.

Another part is, I think, kind of reactionary. I've found myself, by circumstance or life or something, around a lot of people who have a very high level of self-importance, a lot of "look at me." More than their fair share. And I've tended to find that a bit off-putting. And I don't want to be that girl. The one who does something and then needs everyoneeverywhere to tell her how great she is for doing it. The one who makes me wonder what their motivation was in the first place - doing something or getting credit for doing something? I know a lot of that girl (or guy). I don't really like her (or him) so much.

Also, there have been people around me who, I guess, don't like how I am. Like, as a person. Or maybe they don't like how I do things. Or maybe they don't like how I acknowledge (or don't acknowledge) my self. I'm not sure. Maybe they wish I was slightly different. More like them, maybe? I don't know. But it seems that when I do or achieve something, they try to make it part theirs, or something like that. To change it into something else. Almost like they need to impose their idea of how I should react, or what I should want or think or feel or like or do. You know, rather than just respect how I am, or how I regard my own accomplishments, or how I live my own life.

So it just becomes easier to not share things I do with too many others. Which goes back to the first point of reaching goals then moving on. It's odd, I guess, that there are things I've done, of which I am very proud, and very few people even know about it. I'll chatter about silly day-to-day things, sure. Give my opinions, no problem. But big stuff? (At least, big to me.) Not so much.

That's me, though, I suppose. This odd mix of quiet and driven. Who works really hard to meet the goals I set for myself, then doesn't mention it to anyone. But that's what works for me. Maybe that will change someday. But not today. And maybe that's a little bit empowering all by itself. (Just don't tell anyone, okay?)

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Tell It to Me Tuesdays