So, I've been working like crazy to make some changes in my routine. And outlook on life.
On Friday, I saw the doctor for the first time since the "no running" diagnosis. He said he was surprised I was handling it so well. (Oh, what he doesn't know...). But really, I'm trying really hard to simply shift my focus. And it's working pretty well, at this point.
I did a little self-inventory; what do I want now, and how do I want to get there. And then I went and started to rearrange things and add things and subtract things to my life to get on that path.
It turns out, one of the main things I want and need right now is to feel physically strong. So I've revamped my routine to work toward that goal. And I'M LOVING IT!! I'm working myself hard, and (for right now, at least) it feels good. It feels right. And I need it.
I think that with the implosion of the knee and being told I was not able to run, it kind of felt like I'd lost control. These were not choices I had made for myself, and would not have made for myself. They were given to me. Obviously I can't control everything (much as I would like to), but I'm starting to feel some sense of control again. I have a plan. I have some goals set. I'm feeling good. I'm feeling optimistic.
It's a nice change.