Monday, August 16, 2010

stars seem to lose their place

I am supposed to be working on things to get ready for the school year to start. I have a load of work here to type and file and trace and sort and such.

I am not doing any of that.

I keep staring out the window and thinking about that Sting concert last month.

There was a song that made me cry. It's not unheard of for me to cry at concerts. I routinely cry when seeing U2 or REM. But in the eight times I've seen Sting (Hubby's man crush, remember...), I've never even come close to shedding a tear.

But this time? Tears. Lots of them. All due to one line in one song. I've heard the song many times. It's a song I love. But this time, it seemed more.

Just one line.

"I loved you in my fashion."

Two thoughts, one far more important than the other.

I loved you.

In my fashion.

It might not be what you expect. It might not be what you need. It might not be how you need.

But it is.

And I just started crying.

Something in me shifted. Some level of acceptance arrived.

It probably would have helped for that shift to happen sooner. But I guess life happens as it should, when it should. I suppose things have a way of happening when you are ready for them. Or maybe it's when you need them. Perhaps both.

"I loved you in my fashion."

I say it to myself a lot now. Just as a reminder.

It might not be what I expected, but it is love.


Lyndsay said...

Thanks for the reminder.... but is it wrong to say my husband needs a fashion lesson?... heehee..

Bacardi Mama said...

Beautiful post.

Anonymous said...

I feel the same way and have gone through the same thing.