So, Hubby and I are walking out the door yesterday, and as I step on to the porch, I see a box with a long metal rod sticking out of it. Hubby stops behind me and says "Oh, yeah. I was going to tell you about that."
I instantly know that a) this is about the evil demon snake, and b) it is not good.
He continues, "The snake can't get into the house, but..."
At this point I feel the need to stop him, because this is a sentence that does not need a conjunction. It just needs some end punctuation. As in "The snake can't get into the house PERIOD." It would be even better if it was "The snake is gone and will never bother you again PERIOD."
But... He insists on the conjunction. "The snake can't get into the house, but it's crawling up UNDER THE SIDING. But just because it's cooler there. So he can cool off."
And he says this all calm. Like it's okay that our house is Satan's little air conditioner. Like it's just fine that Voldemort uses our siding for a little breather in his day.
Um. No-no. No-no. No-no. No-no.
This is not okay. This is not fine.
A stop must be put to this.
And Hubby (Who actually LIKES snakes... How is that even possible?) tells me he tried to get Kaa out. However, he failed at that time. I have charged him with the task of NOT failing at Basilisk removal, with a timeline of ASAP.
Then, as I was returning from my run this morning, I encountered Sir Hiss slithering (ICK!) across the road in front of the house.
Why did the snake cross the road?
TO GET THE HELL OUT OF MY YARD!
(Oh, pleeeeease just stay gone! I know the woods across the street has GOT to be better for a snake to hang out in. Definitely better than under my siding!)