Friday, June 4, 2010

and... exhale

In a strange way, this is the most difficult part of the school year. The moments just following its ending.

They are moments of decompression.

This is the time when you have to let go.

Let go of all that you didn't do. All that you couldn't do. Everyone you didn't reach. Everyone you couldn't reach. All of the second guessing, the "did I do enough" -ing. All of the days where, if you had just done one little thing differently, it might have changed everything.

To let go of all of the frustration and the stress that seems to have taken up permanent residence inside you.

And it's so hard.

Because you wanted to do everything. You wanted to reach everyone. You wanted to do more than enough. And you wanted to do it all right.

But that is, of course, impossible.

So you just have to know that you did the best you could. To know that it was more than enough for some, and would never have been enough for others. To know that it was all worth it.

And that next year, you get another chance to do it all again.

But for now...

Exhale.

7 comments:

koreen (aka: winn) said...

Hope your weekend is very relaxing... happy weekend!

Jade @ Tasting Grace said...

Yay!! You're DONE!! And I bet you did more than you realize. Students can surprise you. Sometimes it's the ones you think you couldn't reach with a 10-foot-pole, no matter what you did, sometimes they're the ones who most appreciate you.

But. WHATEVER. YOU'RE DONE!! That's pretty much the key part, right? :)

Heart2Heart said...

I loved this, and that is the very reason I love mornings. It's a chance to start all over again and hopefully see new opportunities in the challenges we face in each new day.

Love and Hugs ~ Kat

Julie said...

I am sure the fact that you care so much about reaching everyone means that you did an awesome job and reached even more people than you realize. Have a great relaxing summer break! :)

InTheFastLane said...

you DO make a difference. And now, it is time to use some of those powers on yourself :) Enjoy! (I still have another week...sad face...)

Bec said...

I hear ya- even as a sub it is a strange kind of let down at the end of the year. You just need a few days to decompress and let your brain loose from all the lesson plans and classroom management issues and schedules, etc. This year was particularly rough so my brain is glad to be on a bit of a vacay!

Bec said...

p.s. my captcha was just RECESS. And I was like yes, summer is a reaaaaaallly long recess :)